wtfdto: the cure for contemporary stress: Angel Feet Reflexology

Earthquakes, tsunamis, fear mongers, religious zealots, crackdowns, meltdowns, tea party hate machine, union busters, corrupt cops, puppet politicians, oilsploitation, recession, unemployment, inflation, pollution, extinction…oy vey! It never ends! Stop the world, I wanna get off! But, man, what can I do? I get so worn down with it all, and that is just the newspaper, radio, internet, or however you get your “news” these days. Never mind the groceries, the rent, your love life, church, family, office…

No doubt about it, life is stressful and perhaps a bit more so these days than usual. Where, beyond the local bar or medical cannabis dealer, can the stressed out, urban citizen living on a very tight wad go for relief? $100 an hour massages and treatments are out on my budget, sweethearts. Angel Feet Reflexology is in. That’s right, Angel Feet Reflexology. $25 an hour foot massages right here in DTO on the edge of Chinatown on ninth street at Broadway. Skeptical? Me too, as usual.

I noticed Angel Feet some time ago on my prowls. The name leapt out at me and I was sorely tempted to go in but I was scared––scared of the unknown. How embarrassing for me to have thought this way! What sort of place was it? Would there be a “lounge” with a variety of masseuses to choose from? Incense and gently tinkling bells? Strange elixirs? Spanish Fly on tap? I had too many ridiculous “happy ending” stereotypes running around in my head and they only served to keep me away from one of the best deals in DTO.

Finally, after hearing a report of straightforward pleasures served on the up and up, I took the leap and walked into the fluorescently lit entryway. The hostess, Fanny, greeted me with a huge, and genuine smile, bid me to take off my coat and led me inside. Just past the wall is a large open storefront space; acoustic tile ceiling, lights off, and about a dozen big recliners all lined up. It felt like a wayward first class cabin separated from a jumbo jet. Pillowy soft piano Muzak versions of lost pop hits like “Lady”––that's right, Styx––caressed my traffic worn ears. My eyes adjusted as the hostess led me to my recliner and I realized there were about 3 other people in the room, each one fully clothed and in various states of repose.

Innocuous enough, isn't it?

My masseuse, Cindy, gently placed my feet in a bucket of hot water, lined with a plastic bag. She began by massaging my head with a light oil, hitting various pressure points on my scalp, ears. and face. I could feel yesterday’s 13-hour stagehand shift begin to melt away. Special attention is paid to the pressure points on the feet and the hands as well as in your shoulders, arms, and legs. The whole thing wraps up when the chair is turned flat out and you are laid out on your stomach for a full back rub, all the way to your buns, down to your feet!

There is indeed more to it, but I don’t want to spoil your fun. 25 bucks!!! For an entire hour! Think about it; a restaurant down the street was bragging about a special with $35 bottles of wine. Sorry, that might fly at the Ferry Building in SF––this is DTO! My money is better spent here at Angel Feet and my pleasure far greater. With $40, I can get a great massage; graciously tip my masseuse and have enough left over for Pho Ga at Ba Le.

When I walked out, I was grinning ear to ear and walking on air. My worn out back and feet felt completely rejuvenated. I just love the feeling of walking in, leaving my clothes on and being fully relaxed with a couple of other folks in the same state. The communal vibe of people being totally luxuriated by people who enjoy their work is so good and so fun. This is truly a utilitarian work over that will treat you right. If you work on your feet, on computers, do construction, or just plain get worked, this is your spot.

I thanked Fanny on my way out and she told me that the best part of her business is watching her customers leave smiling. Do yourself a favor and check it out. Angel Feet Reflexology is open 10am to 10pm everyday, and is located at 441, 9th street, just off Broadway. Foot massage is $25 an hour, and a full body massage, on the table is $35. Appointments are available, just call Fanny at 510 228-2996... or just walk in.